4 Years a Bride :: 5 tips for a successful relationship

On the 23rd of March My Husband and I Celebrated 4 years as a married couple.

We literally did nothing to celebrate other than exchanging a few sweet words, watching a show together after the kids when to bed, and stuffing our faces with takeout food.

But seeing as we have been together for over 8 years I wanted to shed some light on things that we have learned that make us a strong and happy couple.

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Communications is KEY!!

Talk, talk, talk, talk talk! If something is bothering either of you, Talk! If you had a bad day, Talk! If they are struggling at work, TALK! No matter WHAT you MUST talk and LISTEN to one another! even if your significant other is annoying you and bothering you, the only way to work through it is to talk about it right away! Neither of you are mind readers!

Make time just to BE together

Whether its a movie night at home after the kids are asleep, a Date night at nice restaurant or just being alone together, no matter how you organise it, it is VERY important to just be with one another. Catch up on the days events, share a meal or in our case, play a computer game together!

Surprises

See something you know they’ll love online? Buy it for them! Make them their favourite meal, or even something as simple as getting them a drink without asking them, or coming home from the supermarket with their favourite treat. no matter how big or small, a surprise can make them feel so special and loved!

Show your partner that you appreciate them

This goes hand in hand with the surprises thing, but be sure to let them know that you appreciate them, the smallest gesture of appreciation makes all the difference, take notice when they go out of their way to do something for you, or for the household or even for a friend of theirs, whatever it is, express yourself and let them know that you appreciate what they do and who they are!

And last but not least

Support them No Matter WHAT!

Probably one of the most important tips I have is to support them in EVERYTHING they do, whether its a career change, a new hobby, an old hobby, a health and fitness decision, or a diet change, or maybe its a past mistake rearing its ugly head again. No matter what may arise, you need to show up for them and prove to them that despite how they feel, or paranoia about a situation, as long as they have you by their side to coach them through it and encourage their decision and support them then they can achieve anything, and so can you. It goes both ways.

These are 5 of the many things i have learned from being with my Husband for the past 8 years. Do you have any tips of your own to share? Let me know!

K x

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My Little Boy Turned 6!

I am now the mother of a 6 year old! How did this happen? Like really?

On March 22 2012 and 8:22PM my Husband and I welcomed a VERY teeny tiny little boy into the world, after a very hard and difficult labour he finally arrived by Emergency C-section weighing 5lb 15oz.

Mayson day 1

Due to his small size, lack of body fat, inability to regulate his body temperature and the stress that the induction and labor put him through he was immediately transferred to the NICU (Newborn Intensive Care Unit) where he was put in the incubator to warm him up, insert a feeding tube (as he was very unmotivated to do anything, he didn’t even cry)

Fast forward 6 years and he is a very tall, very solid, energetic boy with a thirst for knowledge! Over the years he has developed into the kindest, most caring, eager and loving little man while still being reckless and rambunctious.

He can write his own stories, read his own books, play computer games, throw, catch and kick a ball and he is the kindest most loving big brother.

I am beyond proud of the amazing kid he has become and I cannot wait to see what else he achieves!




HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOY!!!




 

How Old are your children? Express your Mommy Pride in the Comments!

K x

What If I Told You That You Could Make Your Dreams Come true?

This morning I had the pleasure to have a conversation with Mel Rose- A Blogger/Youtuber I have followed for over 5 + years, and now have the pleasure to call a Friend. She has just released an E-Book (Or essay as she calls it) called “3 simple ways to live a happier life (instantly)” and We were talking bout happiness and temporary set backs.

I spoke a little of what My Family and I are going through as of late and one thing I said to her reminded me of why I started this blog and Why i want to continue it.

Too often we get so wrapped up in what is going on around us that  we either forget our direction and why we are doing this or we just coast along and start to believe that we are not meant for anything else.

Do something for me, Picture your Dream life- not just a typical image of what society deems a perfect life but really dig deep, envision you career, envision your relationships, where are you living? What are you doing? Who are the people around you?

Now write it down, on your phone, on your computer, on paper- however just write it down.

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Now what would you say if i told you that its 100% possible for you to have that life? Would you believe me?

No Of course you wouldn’t, that seems outrageous right? Now while I don’t have my dream life YET I do know that if i work hard for what i want, i can create my perfect world.

You don’t have to stay in that dead end job, hell you can create a position in any career you choose, you can create a career from literally anything, you enjoy writing, be a writer, you enjoy painting? then paint or like i just said to my husband 2 minutes ago “if you want a decent Stargate SG1 game, Create it” Even he believes he couldn’t do it, because he too has been conditioned to think you have to start from the bottom of a career chain to get anywhere and that isn’t true at all!

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Now I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface of where i want my life to go but the first thing you need to know is that to be able to drive that force, you need to not only believe that it can happen, but also love yourself wholeheartedly the way you are right now to allow those paths to open, and most importantly allow yourself to be happy. Too often we aren’t happy with our weight, our relationships, our jobs and our whole life, that we start to tell ourselves that we don’t deserve that happiness or that opportunity that may present itself.

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You are no good to your dreams or yourself if you keep pouring from an empty cup, Fill your own cup first and give to the world from the energy that overflows. I heard this quote first when i was listening to a Melissa Ambrosini Book on Audible called “Mastering your Mean Girl” And it has resonated with me since, and i reference this quote almost everyday!

So go and buy that self development book, go out for that coffee, get your hair done, go to the gym.. Whatever will help you fill your cup and boost yourself to make that courageous change, Do it!

And don’t thank me for it, Thank yourself, Because you are the only you there is and you are Perfect just the way you are

Kosplay Kristy

Have you ever dressed up for a party before? The thrill of finding the perfect costume that looks exactly like the character your dressing up as? Well imagine doing that everyday? embodying that character like you are them, being so inlove or obsessed with a character that you just wanna feel like them for a while. Well THAT is cosplay!

For the first time ever, I cosplayed at Auckland Armageddon!! But funnily enough, I wasn’t scared, I wasn’t nervous, I wasn’t even self concious and for me thats a huge deal.. Now lets see if you can guess who I embodied for a weekend…. I bet you totes cannot guess!

Oh okay, You got me…

The One The only “HARLEY QUINN”

As you know I have been obsessed with her since suicide squad was announced, what you didn’t know is that I loved her since before then, it just wasn’t on this extreme of a level! I could go into all the reasons why I’m obsessed but that’s not what I’m writing about. So let’s focus on cosplay! You know that lightbulb revelation feeling you get when you finally find a hobby you enjoy or an interest that sparks something in your soul… for me that is cosplay! And never would I have imagined it… it started with colouring my hair pink and blue and doing the makeup for the release of “suicide squad” in 2016

I felt so free and for once didn’t care what anyone thought of me, as the passion grew stronger I came across some amazing ladies who had already achieved what I wanted to do, so I picked their brains and we became the best of friends. For once in my life I didn’t care that I was too big for the role, I cared about creating annaccurate and comfortable costume for my current size instead of drowning in a see of self doubt and depression about being too fat to pull of a Harley Quinn Cosplay.

So I made it my mission to obtain as screen accurate as possible cosplay for wear to my first convention “Auckland Armageddon 2017”

The first thing I got was the wig form Wigisfashion.com and it is GORGEOUS!! The quality is unlike anything I expected! And it’s so soft!

next was the outfit… so for my plus size rendition, I made my outfit with a skirt instead of the shorts! And man did I love it!! It turned out amazing. I also made the shirt myself and I purchased my Jacket from Fjackets.com I want to do a proper video review on this jacket because it’s absolutely amazing! The quality is incredible and the screen accuracy is impeccable considering the low price!!

I did also make a last minute adjustment to the skirt so you could see the boots underneath it, I purchased the boots from eBay.

Then the last thing I had to master was the makeup, and I think it turned out pretty damn well! I didn’t have access to the tattoos so I drew the face tattoos myself. I’d also like to do a video on this makeup if you would be keen to see it

This process was so much fun to do, I even handmade my gun and baseball bat props as well, seeing how it all came together filled me with so much pride not only in myself but for what I had no idea I was capable of creating. I felt so comfortable in the environment and met some incredibly talented people! And let just say this .. my cosplay is only gonna Get better and better and I cannot wait to put together more versions of Harley! When you find a hobby after having none for years it really fills you with a special kind of passion, and while some people may find it weird and a bit insane, some might even go as far as to call me a freak but I embrace it! Where else can you pretend to be someone you admire and be wholeheartedly accepted and encouraged!! The cosplay community can be brutal but I have experienced nothing but love, encouragement and kindness and I continue to make amazing likeminded friends and I cannot wait for the next convention!!

Oh do ya wanna see how it all looked together??

I also did a prison inmate version for another one of the days! She was super fun to put together too!!

If you’d like to see my cosplays or just follow along with that side of my world – I have a separate Instagram just for my cosplay antics! @hausofharleyquinn

Belated 2018 Welcome

I have been battling with myself on how, when and what content to bring to this new year and i just decided, you know what- FUCK IT “just start typing and see how you go” I have had MAJOR writers block despite my desperate desire to start writing again! I have so much to tell you, and so much to share! I missed you! How are you!?

Let me fill you in..

In December I JOINED A GYM.. it took me till mid January to actually pluck up the courage to start going BUT Since the 24th of Jan I have been going 3-4 times per week and LOVING every minute i am there (except when i have to do cardio- we don’t like that)

Jan 24 First Time at the Gym
First Time Attending a Gym (And sticking to it)

Now im not going to claim this is the first time i’ve even joined a gym because its not, I joined another gym a few years ago but had to cancel the membership because we moved out of that town and i just never signed up to a new one till now. I am also not going to say that ive lost heaps of weight or sit here an give you all these tips on what working for me because i havent lost a single kilo (and kept it off) and my eating habits are still pretty bad which i am working on but am still unable to resist cravings and bread! BUT  aside from a 1 week break while i had a bad cold, I have been going to the gym pretty consistently 3-4 times per week since the 24th of January!

I can however tell you that i have lost several CM’s/Inches all over my body, so i guess i have lost fat but gained muscle as i am doing a fair amount of weights, i tend to enjoy weight exercises and pushing it on the machines more than i like staring at the wall while on the treadmill or elliptical, i don’t mind the bike tho so i tend to use that more than the others.

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As you can see my weight has fluctuated a lot but hasn’t really gone down, However… My measurements have been consistently going down, I have lost about 39.5 cm’s in TOTAL over my entire body since the last time i measured myself in May last year.

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It just goes to show me that even though the scale isn’t moving a lot, I am losing weight!

I am so exciting to keep tracking my progress and getting fitter- Oh Man! I can already tell not just in my body but in my workouts that i am already getting much fitter too!! I can push myself to do double what i could when i started, and am even trying out different workouts that i have seen on YouTube, THAT is how much fitter i am getting!

I am actively sharing my daily workouts on Instagram so please go and follow me on there if you would like to follow my daily life and fitness updates

But for now i am going to leave it at that. I am so glad to be back and sharing with you and i cannot wait to see where 2018 takes me cause i am fired up and ready to beat it head on!

Can i also just add that i have never before felt this kind of drive to succeed before, either my self discipline is better or I can adult better, but either way i know in my heart, my soul and my head that this is the path i am meant to continue down and never have i even believed in myself so much as to actually achieve my goals. Its just meant to happen this year, I just know that I am not giving up this time, this is the real deal!

What is driving you to succeed at your goals this year?!

K x

 

 

 

 

 

 

#STOPTHEBUS!

Today we partook in a stand against Child Abuse! Never have I ever done something like this, I didn’t think i would ever have the balls to protest something but when it comes to children, if we don’t stand up for them, who will!?

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I don’t even know how i came across this movement but scrolling through Facebook yesterday I came across a post about something called #STOPTHEBUS. They are a family of 6 driving around the country in a Yellow bus taking a stand against child abuse and making a documentary of the country giving a voice to those who don’t have one.

STOP THE BUS

“We are putting our family of 6 on a bus for a year to create a documentary that will implore New Zealanders to face our problem of child abuse.

We have a vision of people from all walks of life linking arms across the length of New Zealand. We want this movement to be so big that is forever etched as a time in New Zealand history where we as a nation stood for something together and committed to change.
As we travel New Zealand; schools, community groups, sports groups, churches and individuals will be invited to come together to make a stand and link arms across a stretch of land in their area. This may include iconic locations of New Zealand, pieces of highway, mountains, rivers, rugged land, lush land.
The changing landscapes and our diverse people coming together will form a symbolic message for the premise of this documentary. “

Their previous turnout was amazing and i knew as soon as i read about it that i wanted to be a part of it. Hubby took a little convincing because it was pouring with rain and really cold but when he soon realized the power this could have and the fact that he didn’t have a choice, He was on board whole heartedly and he got really into it. The Turnout wasn’t as good as i would have hoped for our community but despite the rain and cold, It had to be done!

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Kids and jackets in tow we ended up being the first of he group to show up, But the fact the we even had 20 people was better than nothing, Including the local newspaper, (who asked to take a photo of Mayson and Molly, and for once they stood and smiled no questions asked!)

I felt so empowered and happy to be a part of something that could potentially help our countries children! Child abuse and Family violence rates in our country are at an all time high and to be a part of something that could bring light to these things happening behind closed doors and wake the country up from turning a blind eye is the best thing I have ever done.

Mayson, the curious 5 year old that he is wanted to know all about what we were doing and once i explained that we are showing the world that hurting children is wrong and we are standing up for them, he couldn’t stop raving about how cool it was that we were doing that, His first response was ” Because you would never hurt me eh Mummy?” right then i knew that we were teaching our children something powerful, and he was so proud of it, Mayson and Molly could even be In the local newspaper showing the rest of our community their pride for standing up against child abuse, Rain, Hail or shine.

If you want to know when they are going to be in your part of the country so you can stand up too then please go and follow their social media to get all of the latest updates, and donate to their powerful cause by going to their website! Every little bit will help them achieve their goal of creating this Documentary.

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#STOPTHEBUSNZ

WWW.STOPTHEBUS.CO.NZ

FACEBOOK – STOPTHEBUSNZ

INSTAGRAM – @STOPTHEBUSNZ

TWITTER – @STOPTHEBUSNZ1

DONATE!!!

Stand up Against Child abuse and give our countries children a voice to be heard!

K x

Inspire;

I have been notorious for comparing myself to other bloggers, social media moguls, celebrities you name it, I’ve compared myself! But i’m working on not doing that anymore, so in the words of the STUNNING Cara Alwill Leyba “If you like something about another woman, TELL Her!!!”

So this is a total boast post of a few babes I am inspired by!

Mel Rose; Author of Food and the City Blog!

I have followed this babe for at least 5 maybe even 6 years, and she is just stunning inside and out! she is an amazing food blogger and i cannot guarantee you wont drool when you read her socials!!! She started off as a beauty blogger on YouTube and branched out into the food blog universe and boy does she know her niche! She posts the most amazing food-grams, fashion posts and inspiring tidbits! Shes stunningly beautiful and she knows how to have a good time! She is the kind of person that once you have found her, you will want to follow every social and be her best friend just like me!

Mel Rose

Jamie Genevieve; YouTuber and Make up Goddess

Jamie, Jamie, Jamie… There’s something about this chick that just makes you feel like her best friend, maybe its the amazing tattoos, the infectious smile or the approachable persona, but honestly, she is EVERYTHING. Jamie is a Professional Make-up Artist and boy is she pure talent. AND, she has just started vlogging!!! 30 minutes of Jamie every week.. AH YES PLEASE! I’m Obsessed, You just need to follow her!

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With The Whittakers / Jordan Whittaker 

This Mama, is probably the sweetest, most genuine person, Shes never put up a front, shes real and honest in all her posts. I remember i wrote her an email last year (cause we are totally friends and everything 😛 I wish) ANYWAY, I wrote her an email basically explaining how sorry i was for neglecting her socials, that it was out of pure jealousy, lack of self esteem and not feeling like i was good enough to be friends with her let alone just try and talk to her cause she is just way too cool for the likes of me. My oh My! I did not expect her response! Not only was she completely cool about it, but she understood, she reminded me that she is human too and that she valued my strength and honesty, Since then I have been to embarrassed to talk to her still but i am getting there,  the best part is that she  DOESN’T JUDGE ME for it! This Mama is Stunning, she is a super fashionista with her style as well as her toddler style for Her children Brooklyn and Marlo, she plans and preps her meals (that look amazing) shes a social media influencer and inspires mums all over the world to be the best version of themselves they can be and to not put so much pressure on themselves, while reminding them that she struggles too, its her job to take good photos and post inspiring tidbits but she has her moments too, just like we all do. Jordan is the mom friend we all need ❤

The Whittakers

Rocky and Ruby Blog / Rebecca Keil

This mama is your classic Kiwi mum with a confident twist, She is cool as a cucumber and real as fuck, shes not afraid to show us that it’s really is okay to say that our kids are really just pissing us off and she doesn’t bend herself or her content to societies norm, she will tell you the great, the fun, the shit and the awful side of parenting and wont take shit from no one. I absolutely LOVE her for this quality, but not only that, she is gorgeous! An MUA by trade, and is so in tune with herself that she can pull off any look, while keeping her kids styled to the nines. I have followed her since she made and sold kids clothing and now she has evolved into this powerhouse blogging mom, she is a breath of fresh air for any mum, and her classic kiwi humor is hilarity!

Rocky and Ruby Blog

Cara Alwill Leyba / The Champagne Diet

I can’t mention Cara without adding her to this list! Cara is a Master life coach, Blogger and Best selling author of my favorite book Girl Code. She has single handedly lead a community of thousands of Lady bosses to pursue their dreams of entrepreneurship, self love, empowerment and to straight up just SLAY BABY! She has changed and improved so many lives as well as her own, she is a Queen in Chanel! I love this woman so much and she inspires me every day to pursue my dreams, even if i don’t know what they are yet, girl has still got me chasing them.

Cara

Now if i could, i would take each and every one of these beautiful ladies out for a coffee and lead into the night with champagne (or beer eh Rebecca 😂 ) , Thank you ladies for being true to who you are and inspiring me to find my true me, Shes here somewhere and if it wasn’t for your light, id never find her ❤

K x